– 2018 –

‘Speed doesn’t matter, forward is forward’ – 

This is my theme, quote or mantra for the year.

The transition from being a university student to now starting fulltime work can bring up a lot of uncertainty and mixed feelings about where you are going.

I find that being at university, I always felt I was going somewhere or doing something with the constant reassurance and positive feedback from lecturers and friends that I am doing well and in the right direction. This is hard to find when you aren’t in that environment, so as someone who thrives off feedback, I can feel a little lost without it – stagnant.

I have this quote plastered everywhere, so it prompts reflection on where I am and what I have been doing and that pace doesn’t matter. It is easy to compare, sometimes things that are not even of interest to you can make you feel as though you are not good enough if someone else is doing it. It feels ridiculous to feel envy or jealousy when someone else has something that you don’t even want but it happens.

So this year I will take my time, try my best to live in the moment, appreciate how far I have come and continue to grow – never stop learning. 

___________________________________________________________________________________________

5 things I am grateful for today

Meeting old friends, having meaningful conversations, reflecting about life and our futures.

My family and their never-ending support.

Quiet breezy mornings.

Eye-opening and informative books.

Nature. 

I’m not lost, I’m on my way.

 

19th November 2017 – Mount Kosciuszko, Thredbo Australia – One of my goals this year was to climb to the summit of Mt. Kosciuszko, time and weather didn’t allow but I made it as far as I could, turned back and made it an adventure for another day. 

 

As exciting as new beginnings can be, it also brings confusions to where you want to go. It feels as though we are supposed to have it all figured out. But I don’t. I saw the following phrase/poem on Facebook, I loved the change in perspective and carefree nature of it:-

I stopped telling myself that I’m lost,

I’m not.

I’m on a road with no destination, I’m just driving with hope that I’ll find a place that I like and I’ll stay there.

I’m not lost, I’m on my way. 

~ Ahunnaya

____________________________________________________________________________________________

5 things I am grateful for today:

the stormy weather

opportunities, possibilities

days off work

life

nature

 

 

Spring & Health

18 days into the month of spring but today was the first day signs of spring were in the air. It was warmer, the wind was fierce and musty as it carry’s particles of pollen on a journey to a place to begin anew. Spring makes me feel happy and light and just as it is new beginnings for nature, it feels like new beginnings to me too.

2 days ago I decided to stop putting a price on my health. There was an exercise regime I have wanted to commit to for awhile now however the price tag pushes me away. I am generally healthy, I try to be however over the past year I have definitely had too many meals that don’t do much benefit to my body and I am starting to feel the consequences.

I put all the guilt that comes with investing in my health aside and signed up for it. It’s funny because I’ve probably spent many dollars on gym memberships and never gone or not made the most of it without feeling guilty. I decided that I rather pay for something more expensive that I know that I will do than something that isn’t, which I won’t end up using anyway.

Money is complicated and I am trying to develop a healthier, richer mindset about money. I think not putting a price tag on my physical or mental wellbeing is a step in the right direction. Afterall, putting in the effort to be healthy now, means less bills later in life, bills that will probably come in big lumps. Your body is all you have got till the end of your life, it can enhance the way you live or limit it and you are stuck with so it so best take care of it.

So what shifted my mindset?

• Reading ‘How not to die’ by Dr. Michel Greger – He goes through the top non-communicable diseases in society, addressing why they are present and then how to lessen the chances of an early death.
• Downloading Dr. Michel Greger’s Daily Dozen app (it’s free) – it provides a rough estimate of how much fruits, vegetables, nuts and all the good stuff you need daily to maintain your health. The more things you tick off the list, the better your gut will feel.
• Reading ‘You are a badass at making money’ by Jen Sincero – I don’t agree with all she says but I have taken on board the good bits. I have become aware of my own negative mindset when it comes to money and am slowly shifting it.
• Reading ‘Gut’ by Guilia Enders – this book provides the science behind how your gut works, the mechanisms and its importance in our function as humans.

I don’t think any one of these resources on it’s own would have really helped me. I think it’s the combination and holisitic understanding I have now that has shifted my mindset. I am so glad because better late than never plus my degree is coming to an end so fulltime work means i’ll have to manage an income wisely. No better time to learn about money and health than now.

(Note: Only spend money on things that are within your means. Just like your health, your finances are important too. If you want to pay for something that you feel you can’t afford, perhaps analuse your spendings and see what ‘luxury’ items you can sacrifice to allow space for other things in your life. That is what I did. )

__________________________________________________

5 things I am grateful for today:

Spring

My Determination

Relaxing days

Being alive

Books, books, books

 

 

Breathe.

breathe in, love.

breathe out, hate. 

breathe in, gratitude.

breathe out, resentment.

breathe in, joy.

breathe out, hostility. 

breathe in.

breathe out.

Clarity. Carefree. Content. 

___________________________________________________________________

5 things I am grateful for today:

Life

Love

Simplicity

Chance to relax

Books that are practical

National BestFriend Day.

 

Apparently, yesterday (8th of June) was National Best Friend’s Day so I thought it would be nice to write a post to remember and thank my best friends through the years.

I recently scrapped the idea that you can only have one best friend. It was limiting and in actual fact, I had many good friends who are all important to me and who all the deserve the label of ‘best friend’.

Growing up I never had many friends, I was very shy and never approached anyone unless talked to.

Today, I want to thank the one friend who broke my shell and helped me shine through with confidence. I believe that meeting her was life changing for me, the course of my whole life changed because I was transformed as a person. I was finally not afraid to be me. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me everything by just being you.

Next, to the friends that listen and give me logical and honest advice – you help me out of the deepest of wells by giving nothing but an ear.

To the friends, whom I can talk for hours about everything but people – you are gems, you inspire me and show me the goodness in this world. Just by communicating your thoughts and ideas about the world, not the individual people in it.

To the friends who are far, but feel so close – how we manage to bridge continents and have a solid relationship, is beyond me. Not everyone can find the time to tend to those who are not physically present – for that you are special.

To the friends who I can have countless adventures with, whether it is travelling, hikes or visiting the newest cafes, thank you for sharing your wanderlust with me.

To my boyfriend for being all those friends in one – I appreciate every moment.

And lastly, to my sisters, who were my first best friends, who will continue to always be now and forever.

Happy National BestFriend Day!

____________________________________________________________________________________________

5 things I am grateful for today:

The Sun – you came out today, and you decided to stay, shining through my window and warming up my room!

Leaves – I just love looking at leaves in the wind, it is so calming.

All my friends!

Past self – I often find that my past self is a lot more organised than I give her credit for, making the self now have less work!

The library – you are so warm and calm!

Respect.

Moving to Melbourne after living in Canberra for a fair few years was exciting and hard on many different aspects. One major concern when I moved 1.5 years ago was friends. I had had the same friends for a while now, they were familiar and I was comfortable.

What I failed to realise when I was younger but understand now is the quality of the people you surround yourself with. 

Some of this, I realised during the last years of my undergraduate degree where I voluntarily drifted from the people who were toxic in my life. They added nothing but pain, they didn’t make me a better person and they definitely did not make me happy. 

It’s funny because when you are a child you struggle to differentiate good friends from bad friends. You just long to be friends with everyone, be loved and liked, most importantly, have someone to play with at lunch.

We are taught that having friends is important, but we are not taught how to be good friends or to tell the difference from good and bad friends. Or that it is okay to walk away without seeming weak. We are not taught how to respect ourselves and because of this so many children get hurt by their ‘friends’ everyday.

Because of this I only learnt to walk away from people who shouldn’t have had a place in my life, a few years ago.

Today, I find myself saying no to gatherings with people who I don’t feel my best self around without hesitation. Today I know that if I don’t find the quality in relationships, it probably isn’t worth my time. Today I know that if I am in doubt, the answer is probably no. Today I know how to respect myself but I wish I learnt that long time ago. 

This does not mean I do not give people a chance, I do, it just means I trust my intuition. It means I cherish every moment with people who make me happy, enlighten me and spark joy. And the ones who make me feel uncomfortable or put negative thoughts in my head, are kept a little further away.

I am sure that some people feel the same about me too, but that is okay.

The key is to show appreciation, love and respect to those who treat you with the same regard. The people who don’t like you? Well that’s okay, because no one can like everyone.

Quality over Quantity. 

__________________________________________________

5 things I am grateful for today:

Lazy days in – I was supposed to do my assignment, I sort of did but it was mostly a lazy day in.

Youtube – Man, do you hold a wealth of free knowledge!

Coffee – I wasn’t drinking coffee for a while but the cold weather has sparked a new love for it!

Creativity – Just loving my creative thoughts lately.

Nature – while sitting in my bedroom, I observed the changing weather all day long, it was beautiful.

Till again ♥

Without you, there is no us.

January 2016 – Sri Lanka

In times of stress and worry, I fail to look after myself. Sometimes the pressures of life make it seem as though you come last, everything else matters but you. I am here to tell you and myself that this is not true, even though you may feel otherwise.

Whatever your worries and/or stresses may be, there are some things we all have to do to take care of ourselves. Not only will these things alleviate your stress but also prompt you to formulate more logical, objective and structured answers to your problems.

1. Eat – nourish your body to nourish your mind. Eating is vital. Your brain is already on overdrive in times of stress, not eating will cause a malfunction. So do not forget to eat. Balanced meals would be ideal, but eating in general is a good place to start. (unless you are a stress eater, which in this case probably doesn’t apply to you)
2. Sleep – my simple rule when making big decisions or when trying to get through something, is sleep. No better way is there to shut yourself off for a few minutes or hours, to rest and settle and approach the problem with a better mindset.
3. Go outside – extremely overlooked when stressed is nature and the calmness it can bring. I find going for a walk (doesn’t have to be long) and focusing on the sky, trees (especially leaves) and the weather extremely relaxing. It also puts things into perspective, that this world is full of great simple things, you just have to notice them.
4. Take a shower or bath – this is almost ritualistic to me. After a really bad day or situation, I take a shower almost to signify getting rid of negative emotions and thoughts and moving on refreshed.
5. Read a book – sometimes I know that my problems are small and easy to deal with but I am still upset and overwhelmed, I have a go to book called ‘Opening the Door of Your Heart: And Other Buddhist Tales of Happiness’ by Ajahn Brahm who is an English buddhist monk that writes short thoughtful, quirky and light stories that gives you a change of heart. That is just my go to, whatever works for you is good.
6. Journal/write things down – Externalising your feelings and thoughts is so helpful when you are overwhelmed and confused. You can reflect on what you have written and even make your own prompts/questions to answer, to better understand how you are feeling. I journal a few times a week and this space is also an outlet for me, writing what I am going through is a release.

 

And those are my 6 strategies that may or may not work for you, but they work for me. There are many others and not every problem in life can be solved with these. I acknowledge some problems are extremely complex and terrible, but for day to day get downs, these work well.

Take care of yourself and love yourself, you are important. 

Taken for granted.

Sometimes I feel like I am taken for granted, taken advantage of and not appreciated. 

These are terrible things to feel so I have decided to redirect my feelings to remind myself of the things most of us take granted for in life and to appreciate these things.

1. Garbage collectors – most of you wake in the early morning hours before the rest of the city to collect our waste. You ensure cleanliness, hygiene and overall beauty of our surroundings.
2. Teachers – personally I have always had a level of respect for teachers, whether it be a cultural thing or just my appreciation towards them but they deal with a lot, are constantly under pressure and under paid. Education is the cure to most issues in this world, so without our teachers/mentors/lecturers, knowledge would struggle to be passed on.
3. Mothers and Fathers – The countless and altruistic efforts of my mother and father to take care of their family is admirable.
4. Freedom – Although some may argue none of us are really ‘free’, I am free compared to the many others in this world, past and present.
5. Safety – I come from an area that is relatively safe, I can walk out and not feel scared. Unfortunately, sometimes terrible things do happen but right now the chances of that are low for me.
6. Opportunities – everyday we dismiss opportunities because it isn’t the opportunity we wanted, but we must be grateful that we even got the choice to decline an opportunity.
7. Home – I am lucky enough to call 3 places home; my home in Melbourne, my parents home in Canberra and my family home in Sri Lanka. I have a place to go back to every night, to be safe and warm and that should never go unappreciated.
8. Food – the ability to walk into your kitchen, shop or restaurant and grab any food you may please is a blessing.
9. Free time – These days we spend a lot of time in front of screens aimlessly scrolling through social media, our free time dwindles into nothing and we also feel like we are always running out of time.
10. Sun – I definitely don’t appreciate the sun enough. I love the sun and on gloomy days I complain but fail to go out enough on sunny days.

Adventure #4

Another day, another adventure. 

Located not far from Gisborne near the Macedon Ranges is Trentham waterfall, approximately 1.5 hours north from the city of Melbourne.

Leaving midday, we travelled through the city, plain grassland, beautiful rural towns before arriving at the fall, that is hidden away in the forest.

The air is clean and crisp at the falls, consciously breathing is a must to truly appreciate and feel alive.

The soil is damp and the rocks are loosening as mother nature shifts and evolves through time. So be careful.

The day was splendid and spent in good company.

 

Love.

It’s been a few days, we’ve been apart.

I see his broad smile, as I’m coming in.

Arms open wide, a warm embrace, a hug.

Our eyes meet, our souls enmesh.

We hold hands, we laugh, we talk,

We sneak a kiss.