Breathe.

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breathe in, love.

breathe out, hate. 

breathe in, gratitude.

breathe out, resentment.

breathe in, joy.

breathe out, hostility. 

breathe in.

breathe out.

Clarity. Carefree. Content. 

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5 things I am grateful for today:

Life

Love

Simplicity

Chance to relax

Books that are practical

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Being Alive.

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This morning I woke up feeling unusual. If I was going to describe it, I would say that I didn’t feel alive. I don’t mean in a breathing way, but internally, I didn’t feel much.

I wasn’t motivated to start my day, I was tired, I wasn’t particularly excited about anything short or long term. It just felt like another typical day that I believe most of us live because we have to and that is what we do.

I didn’t want to go to attend my classes, or get out of bed, I didn’t want to think of what to eat or the assignments I have waiting for me to complete, I honestly didn’t want to think. Having a little peace in this world, peace from your own thoughts, is hard to come by and that was all I wanted. Constantly feeling the push and pull from everything that I HAVE TO DO is exhausting. Is there a time when humans don’t HAVE TO DO anything? 

Becoming aware and assessing these feelings is tough. Self-awareness is hard in itself but being able to critically reflect on your own emotions as they are happening is a skill that we all continually learn through life.

First, I thought maybe I am lazy or depressed and need to figure my shit out. Then I realised that this is normal, not wanting to do is normal, people just do things anyway because they have to. There aren’t many times in life where you don’t have to do anything, so I told myself to relax, nothing is wrong with me, wanting peace is normal and I didn’t do anything but catch up with an old friend over some tea.

Today, was a day where packing your things and going on a new adventure anywhere, near or far, would have been ideal. It would have made me feel alive, broken routine and changed perspective.

I hope I can do that soon, I want to feel alive because what is the point of life, if you aren’t quiet living?

All of us should incorporate things that make us feel ALIVE into our lives, whatever it may be, because amongst the hustle and bustle we forget that we should do things we want to do, not just do things we have to do!

5 things I am grateful for:

  1. Tea and good friends.
  2. Thoughtful conversations.
  3. My onesie – because it’s cold out and it’s warm.
  4. Support – to anyone who has supported me through life!
  5. Life.

Till again!

Silence.

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The Melbourne Skyline at Sunset

I truly enjoy the silence and serenity of being alone. 

The best moment to be alone is in the early hours of the morning. Everyone is still asleep and you experience a time where the world is quiet, calm and beautiful.

I feel these moments when I am taking long drives. The atmosphere is different but I feel the same. The world is moving, yet stagnant. 

I like being immersed in my thoughts, to dream, to imagine, to plan, to recount and be at ease about where I am now.

Silence is the best sound. Silence is the echo of unspoken words. At times, it is not what is said but what isn’t said that truly defines a person. 

Silence brings moments of clarity.

Each and every one of us should embrace moments of silence in our lives every single day. This world is busy and noisy. Spending time alone in silence ensures that you do not lose yourself or who you are amongst the hustle. 

Welcome silence, do not disturb it. 

5 things I was grateful for yesterday.

  1. Socialising with old friends – I decided to catch up with some old work friends, its been over an year, we have all grown. It is nice to share our growth.
  2. My mom – Since going vegan, I can’t eat many biscuits. Our family ritual is to have tea at 5pm everyday, eat biscuits, have tea and talk about the day. My mom came home one day and said I bought you biscuits, I checked the ingredients and everything. I truly appreciate her efforts and support.
  3. Silence – These days I like to be left alone. I want time to myself. When the house is quiet I appreciate those moments.
  4. Nature – The sky has been beautiful in Canberra.
  5. One on one interaction – People change around groups of people, I really enjoy one on one time with an individual as opposed to group events. People are their true selves when they are alone.

Till Tomorrow.